Time to Vent

I have exactly 48 minutes before we sit down for our nightly homework. I just got everything ready and wanted to vent.

I am so tired of spending so much time analyzing everything and everyone! I wish I could be as nonchalant as some people and just not think twice about things. I can't! I toil over things hours, days, even months after they happen. They just kinda fester before the issue fizzles out! In fact, after my wedding I stewed over some of the "things" that didn't go as planned. They were so minor most people probably didn't even notice, but I did. That night, I stewed over those minute details! This is a really bad habit and I should really pray that God will release me from this self-destructive way of thinking.

Motherhood...
Being a mother is the most rewarding, frightening, and exhausting thing I've ever done! I know I'm not perfect, but I can't imagine doing one more thing for my family than I do now. Where would the energy come from?

My oldest son is having an issue with his attitude lately and it's lasting longer than I would like! Being from the old school, there was a certain way these types of issues were dealt with that are highly frowned upon today. That plus, our culture was so different. We knew that we had absolutely no authority and that was a that. However, we were still parented in a way that allowed us (most of us) to fall into place when we became adults. The problem is, kids today are faced with higher expectations at an earlier age (in most areas except behavior and social development). Without balance, you find the super smart kid that can't control his/her mouth. I don't want that! I want both, the smartie without the smart mouth. Factor in the individual personalities yada yada...

I think the most frustrating part of all of this is the fact that other parents play the tally game grading kids and their parents on their "performances". When in actuality, we all have issues! Trust me, I know mine! All kids are different so, parenting styles and techniques have to be different.

I guess this is the joy of parenting in an unconventional way!